your goose is probably only half-baked at this point

Henry David Thoreau once wrote the famous piece of advice: Simplify, simplify, simplify. He'd likely be patently horrified  by this recipe, I should think, because I took the idea of a two-ingredient cake (which involves mixing a can of pumpkin with a can of spice cake and baking it until it's done) and turned it into what amounts to carrot cake that lacks carrot but has a bajillion other ingredients in it instead. Whoops. The cake's super good, though! I made the first one with a spice cake, and it was all right, then I made the second one to the specifications you see here, only I'd had a really trying day at work and was exorcising my anxieties via baking, and there was definitely a glass of very potent wine involved somewhere along the line, and so at some point I discovered that not only is it TOTALLY possible to separate your thumbnail from the rest of your thumb by picking at the frilly butt-end of a granny smith apple, it really bloody hurts  because apple...

I love pie but I'm not a fan of pie crusts, and besides that I'm terrified of making my own dough I've learned how to make my own crusts and they're a pain in my ass. It's crumbles, then, and thankfully this crumble is where it's at. Seriously. I've made more of them in less time than I care to admit. Inspired by this lovely recipe , but of course and as always modified to be awesome because that's how I roll. Cherries and apples are, so far, the best, but it's also amazingly good with strawberries, blueberries, and peaches. No news yet on what happens if you mix fruits, but you know? I'm willing to bet that it is delicious. Uploaded for Amy because she's dear to me. Edit: Updating this to double the recipe because 13x9" of pie is better than a square pan of pie, duh.  Crumblin' Down Ingredients Filling - 2 lb (32 oz)  fresh fruit of some kind - cherries, strawberries, blueberries, you get the picture. - If using ...

My long-suffering partner loves crab-cakes, so in 2012, I tried to make him crab-cakes for his birthday. The result was barely edible - too much Old Bay seasoning, too dry, too ... just gross in general. Scared me away from making crab-cakes for two solid years, through it fortunately didn't dim my partner's love of crab-cakes. Made me feel guilty every time he ordered them in a restaurant because a) crab-cakes are fucking expensive and b) it served as a reminder that I'd fucked up. So this year, I decided to face my fears and bought the man two cans of crab for Christmas, with the promise that he could have crab-cakes whenever he wanted. He probably suffered PTSD from that, since the last crab-cakes I made were truly that awful , but by his birthday this year (three months later) he'd overcome his fear (or maybe his stomach had overwhelmed his fears) and asked me to make him some crab-cakes. The recipe I found and used is easy and delicious. I glared at it suspicio...